Here Comes The Rain..

First of all, I would just like to start by saying that the reason I have been "slacking" off on my blog is not even my fault. My laptop hard drive failed and we just got a replacement! Better late than never, right! Anyways, I have had an EXTREMELY tough past week. I made a post awhile back about being patient and just letting God do things on His own time. I never told anyone the exact situation I was talking about, so here goes. Nick and I have been trying to get pregnant since June. We weren't really in any hurry, we just planned on letting things happen when God let them happen. However, When October rolled around and I still had not gotten pregnant, I began the usual panic of, "Is there something wrong with me?" But much to my surprise, I ended up finding out I was pregnant in November. We decided to wait until I was at least 14 weeks before we told anyone. It was one of the hardest things I've had to do, to not pick up the phone and send a massive "I'm pregnant!" text. Luckily, I restrained. On December 5th, I was about 7 weeks pregnant, Nick and I were at Bed Bath and Beyond when I felt like something was wrong. I went to the bathroom and sure enough, something was wrong. I didn't have insurance at the time, so Nick and I decided to wait it out and see if it would stop later on in the day. It didn't. I cried most of the night and first thing the next morning we went to the Labor and Delivery Room. My fear of a miscarriage was reassured by my doctor. I'm still a little... unsure of how I'm feeling about this. I've been told, "Well, at least it happened this early, and not later on when it could have been worse." I guess that's one way to look at it. Definitely not my way of seeing things. I just realize people are trying to be supportive and don't necessarily know the right things to say. Nick and I have decided to hold off on all "baby-making" plans and just wait and let God do His thing. It's hard to grasp the reasons behind God's plans, but I know the plans He has for us are much greater than any plan we could make for ourselves. I rest assured in knowing that now Kylie has someone new to play with--a brother--(I just have this feeling that the baby would have been a boy.) Other than that, I'm doing okay. I took a much needed week off from work. I was in a tremendous amount of pain, which they are still yet to determine exactly why, but I will be seeing the doctor again after the holidays.

I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go, I will
       counsel you and watch over you.
                                                                                   - Psalm 32:8