Relationships.

I've been reading I Will Carry You.. And it is absolutely amazing.. It has also taught me quite a few things and I am only half way through it.. I love the relationship Angie and her family have with God.. And how they are patient enough to listen and for his reply.. Their relationship with Christ has reminded me of the book the The Shack.. and how God should be like our best friend and not just someone we talk to when we are hurting or need help.. He should be someone we thank every night for everything and tell everything to.. And I've realized that that is my downfall and what I am going to work on. I can't just talk to God when I'm thinking of Kylie.. I have to thank him everyday for Kylie..and Nick..and everyone who's helped me get to where I'm at..

Also, Nick and I have been talking about cleaning Kylie's room, because it has become more of a storage..And I brought up the idea of packing up her bedding, mobile, bottles, diaper bags, diapers, clothes, and bouncer.. Since we plan on moving in December, and we're not going to be using any of her things.. And to my surprise,, Nick didn't approve.. He said "Babe.. I want it to be her room still" And this surprised me for two reasons 1) I had previously put away things that were JUST Kylie's.. That we would never use with another child again..and he told me to just do whatever I wanted.. like it didn't matter to him.. and 2) As bad as it seems, these past few months I thought that I was alone in feeling that way.. That Nick... I dont want to say didn't care.. Because I know he did.. but I guess I just thought that it was easier for him to move forward.. and I was standing still.. but ti was actually relieving to hear him respond that way today.. and it made me feel.............................................. normal.