Eat Love Pray

I've officially decided that I'm going to do my very best to write at least a few times a week. I know I've said it many times before, but I'm really going to try. I never realized that how helpful blogging could be, but when I'm having a horrible day, even just posting pictures makes me feel better.

A couple weeks ago I remembered an online blog I wrote in high school. It was crazy to see the things that I worried about 6 years ago. My main topics were boys and the fun nights we had planned. It's astonishing how careless I was then, compared to now, I had no worries, no one to take care of, no bills to pay, and now that's all my life consists of. I guess it could also be called "growing up." When I was in high school I never would have guessed that I would have a daughter by 20 or evern in a million years have thought my daughter would leave this world before me.

I think about Kylie every second of everyday. While working, I pass by Halloween costumes and dream about dressing Kylie up, and what she would have been. I've decided she would probably have been a lady bug. I had started calling her my Kylie Bug, and no matter what Daddy had said, I'm sure she would have been a lady bug. It's amazing to me how far I've come with dealing with Kylie's death. I know that I will never be "over it," or "forget" about it. But I feel at peace with where she's at, and although it will never be okay that she's not here, there's absolutely nothing I can do, except know that I will see her again. It doesn't make the pain go away, but it a little comforting.

Here's a little treat.. :) Another picture of my cute niece Ava..

I'm very excited for what God has planned for Nick and me. :)